I suppose it’s time that I finally come to terms with the fact that I actually have to go to Iraq. I’ve somehow deluded myself into thinking that at the last minute something would happen and I wouldn’t leave – our company would be excluded in the major deployments going on here at Ft. Hood, or some medical catastophe would render me non-deployable. Guess I thought wrong.
The good news is that I’ll be making a little extra money, I’ll be getting some great experience working on equipment I’ve never worked on, and I’ll be making best friends (or enemies!) for life. All that comes with the sacrifice of not seeing my beautiful wife and 2 bubbly children for a year. (Yeah, yeah, I get 2 weeks R&R during the year, but seeing your family for 14 days out of 365 is pretty crappy.)
Some random thoughts about going to the sandbox:
- Will my family survive without me? (Of course they will – they did it once during Basic Training, and once during Army School, plus they are a lot tougher than I am)
- Will I survive without my family? (I’ve done it before, but not for that long)
- How hot is it where I’m going? (The high was 119 yesterday. Sheesh.)
- What about internet? ($700/6 months, which is ~ $117 a month. Double sheesh.)
- What about finishing up my degree? (Still a maybe at this point, depending on the whole internet situation.)
I’m not worried about dying or being injured (the casualty rate where I’m being sent is almost non-existant), but more anxious about how I’m going to live for a year or so without being around my boys every day. Will they remember me? How much will they change, grow, develop, and learn while I’m gone? I wish I could freeze them for a year so I wouldn’t miss a single second of their lives. I all that time without their daddy doesn’t cause them too much harm. My wife has the hardest job of all. While I’m off being too busy to worry about home, she has a full-time job plus the responsibility of a single parent. I bet she is exausted every day for that year.
Am I nervous? Sure, a little. Am I excited? Absolutely – I can’t even fathom what I’m about to experience. Let’s just hope the experience only lasts for a year.
I can’t believe you are in the Army and are being deployed. Wow!! I hope you have tons of exciting adventures. You will be telling the stories for the rest of your life.
Nikki
Comment by Nikki Wallace — October 19, 2006 @ 1:08 am
This is a pretty awesome blog. I think it explain everything perfectly about deployment and the feelings that a family has before it happens.
Comment by Erica Frisk — November 21, 2006 @ 8:03 am